tellhimfred.com

EDIT: This post was conceived in the TellHimFred.com forums, where Hoffa asked us to post our P.O.S. cars of the past. We threw these all together in one blog post (Thx Opposite), and in doing so, it looked like one long post with no context.

So, what POS cars have you owned in the past? Here’s a list of what we’ve compiled so far today in the forum. 

Jimmy Hoffa

Me and Opposite were talking this morning about old cars we’ve had - because i had a dream last night that I had my old “Crapi” a 71 Mercury Capri - loved that car. Like this one, but black:

but then, of course you have to go back to the beginning, to the War Wagon. a 1984 Ford Farimont wagon.

After that, the Rock-’n-Roll-mobile, so named for its rich, buttery shocks that bounced like an overstuffed sofa. a 1986 Ford Country Squire Wagon. (Complete with wood paneling)

After that was the Crapi, then came the Space Shuttle. A 1992 Mercury Sable Station LX (4.2L V6) wagon

That guy lasted quite a while, but eventually died, and after a lengthy dry spell, I ended up with The Ditch Digga:

Soon, should things go well…I will be breaking completely out of the station wagon mold…

But lets see some pics of your old cars.

Opposite Prime

The only vehicle I owned while in High School was the Tank. A 1986 Celebrity Station Wagon. Mine was silver, but the rust on the picture below is an accurate depiction. Called the Tank about the same time I got the nickname Crash.

A week after getting my license, I sideswiped a telephone pole, staving in everything on the passenger’s side from the rear door thru to the quarter panel. I hit a few trees, manhole covers ripped the exhaust pipe from the catalytic converter which caused the pipe to sometimes detach, making the thing sound like a stock car. Because of that, I had to keep a thick rag in the back so when the pipe detached, I could pull over and get under there to re-attach it.

No cars through college, then my daughter came along. I now drive a ‘07 Honda CR-V:

Ms. Connections:

Wow, you had a lot of Shaggin Waggins…I’ve had a couple myself, so I know.
Here is my first car that Brett and I shared. I hit sooo many cars in the school parking lot with this little baby. We also used to take this car “off roading” all over my front yard until my dad remember that the septic tank was located just a few feet underneath us and stopped our fun.
anyway, here’s a similar car…mine was an 1987 Subaru GL and it was my favorite car up until 2008.

Next came the “Brown Stain” which was the epitome of a grocery getter.

Then was the white Subaru station wagon that went to college with me.

After that came the first car I actually bought myself which sustained more damage than I’ve ever seen on one car.

And finally my current car…one that I’ve wanted since I was 14 years old, my VW Jetta 2.0 T. I love this car.

Barry Freed

Here are my cars:

1. 1986 Pontiac t1000:

Ah yes, the Brown Noise as it was affectionately called. My first car. I bought it from Ruth for $300 I think, and it got me all over the place. I drove it to NY several times, took it to Mohegan Sun, etc. If I knew then what I know now, I would be too cautious to take that car so far.

2. Oldsmobilie Cutlass

I don’t have a lot to say about this car.

3. 1994 Buick Lesabre Presidential

Though cool looking, this car was nothing but trouble. Everything was wrong with it from almost day one.

4. 1993 Buick Park Avenue

A yes, the couch on wheels.

5. 2007 Nissan Versa

My current car, which I really love despite its diminutive stature.

Mrs. Opposite

Mrs_Opposite’s old vehicle was the indestructible 1996 Buick Regal. This thing was a freakin monster. 100% solid steel w/ a top speed of about 92mph. Which, incidentally, was the only time the vehicle was pulled over. Opposite’s brother, Rube, was driving.

Randi

My first car ever was the deathtrap known as the 1988 Pontiac Fiero. When I went to trade this car in, they asked me if it was in good working order. I lied and said “Oh yeah! There’s nothing wrong with this car!” The dealership took it for a test drive to decide what to give me for a trade. It died when they were driving it and they wound up pushing it back to the dealership. Until that point, I didn’t know what real embarrasment was.

Then I got a 1992 Pontiac Sunbird…and it was a huge POS. I was driving one day on a really busy Phoenix street and it just stopped. The power cut out and it just died.

I decided to give up on Pontiacs after that…

So then the 1999 Saturn Coupe. It looks sporty and fast, but not so much.

Then the 2002 Hyundai Accent (Same as Ms. Connections’ old car). This picture cracks me up, because it’s going so fast…like it needs a spoiler…and ground effects.

Lastly, my current car, the 2003 Hyundai Santa Fe.

Rube McGuire

Since my (Opposite_Prime’s) brother, Rube McGuire, works for a company that doesn’t allow viewing of the interwebs, he’ll post for him.

1992 Oldsmobile Cutlass Sierra (the Oldsmo-bobble)

-Once made it through mud pits that made a 95′ Toyota SR5 (pickup) use 4X4 to get through -
-With Yokohama performance tires - out ran numerous adversaries
-Once clocked going around a tight corner at 92mph - in a 45mph zone

1997 Honda Civic HX

-Once took the lead in a late night road race by passing on the sidewalk, then drifting (sideways) through a 90 degree corner at 55mph
-Hit top speed (120+) on a back road (Beech Ridge, the road we grew up on)

HONORABLE MENTION
1997 Nissan Maxima

-this was our parent’s car (still is, actually) Rube was clocked at 87 in a 35 (with foot hard pressed on the brake). He then proceeded to bag ass and run from the cop. Almost got away too. Cops cornered him when he tried to get away in a housing development. “Get out of the vehicle, hands up!” Cuffed. Arrested.
-regularly could hit 110 in this thing. Don’t know if it can do it anymore.

Current vehicle
2007 Chevy Silverado Z71

-Beat Acura Integra in Drag Race
-Can pull off :
-4×4 doughnuts - vehicle pivots around the center, not the front wheels
-reverse 180’s - not bad for a 1/2ton full size pickup.

Cutty

Wait wait, I can contribute!

First car:

1987 Dodge Aries Station Wagon. Not a K car, but crappy none the less.

Second car:

Without the body styling, but with the GT. AKA, “The Anal Probe”

Third car:

The Geo Prizm, AKA the crappiest car ever created. 0-60 in about 3 weeks.

Fourth car:

86 Buick Century. Got it from grandma, was my favorite car until someone rear-ended me on I-5 in California. Drove it for 2 Years after that.

Fifth car:

Mercury Cougar. This car was FAST with it’s V-8. Got about 10 miles to the gallon too.

Current car:

I like this car but in today’s gas market, it is expensive to drive. I’m with Jimmy on getting a motorcycle just to save gas.

Discuss in the forum